5 Myths of Youth Ministry

A myth is often thought of as something that is commonly believed but is untrue. We’ve all heard some wild myths before. Here are a few…

• Gum stays in your stomach for 7 years. False. Perhaps this myth came from parents who didn’t want their kids to swallow non-food items.
• Sitting close to the TV can damage your eyes. False. While sitting close to the TV can cause headaches or eye strain, it will not damage your vision. So, scoot a little closer and enjoy your movie.
• Youth pastors just play dodgeball, eat pizza, and drink soda. False (and maybe a little true!)

Myths are fun to debunk and joke about, but when it comes to youth ministry, are there some myths that start to sound true? Myths that start to feel heavy?

I believe there are some common myths about youth ministry that quietly shape how we lead, how we measure success, and how we define faithfulness. The danger is that when we buy into these myths, we find ourselves in a place of discouragement, burnout, or chasing after the wrong things.

So, let’s call them out. Here are five common myths about youth ministry and the Gospel truths that cut through them.

1. YOUTH MINISTRY IS ALL FUN AND GAMES

I’ll be the first to say it: games matter. Laughter builds trust. Joy, happiness, and laughter come from God, and students are more likely to lean in spiritually and emotionally when they know their ministry is a place they can belong and enjoy. Now, if playing games is the primary motivation for students to come to your group, you should reevaluate.

Fun builds culture, but if all your ministry offers is fun, guess what? You’re not discipling, you’re entertaining, and despite the many reasons that’s wrong, it’s probably not what you signed up to do. Students need Jesus more than dodgeball or a silly game. Fun should be a tool, not your biggest ministry goal. Use fun to open a relational door, but keep pointing them to Jesus.

2. YOUTH MINISTRY IS ONLY ABOUT STUDENTS

It’s easy to think your whole job is about reaching middle and high schoolers. After all, they’re the ones you’re engaging with the most. But youth ministry doesn’t exist in a vacuum. Parents, families, and volunteers are a massive part of your ministry focus.

A youth minister really has four main audiences: students, volunteers, parents, and church staff/leadership. This doesn’t mean students only get 25% of you’re time, but they’re not the only ones you’re called to serve.

A truth I’m learning more and more is that you can’t effectively disciple students without equipping and engaging with parents. Some of the best youth ministries I see are ones that invest intentionally in students, volunteers, and families.

3. BIGGER IS ALWAYS BETTER

Perhaps it’s social media, our pride, unhealthy pressure, goals, or some combination of all of the above. It’s tempting to believe that if your group isn’t big or at least bigger than the ministry down the road, it isn’t successful. When you see the group down the road post a photo of 200 students in their own student building, you suddenly compare it to your 25 students crammed in the old choir room behind the sanctuary.

Numbers matter because people matter, but they are not the measuring stick for success in your ministry. Be faithful with whoever God has entrusted to you. It’s a pure trap when your entire focus is “trying to have the biggest youth group.” If left unchecked, you might also find within you a spirit of jealousy being formed. Jealous of the church down the road or the account you follow on social.

Remember: God has called and placed you in your local church. Bigger doesn’t equate more faithful, more spiritual, or more effective. Celebrate who’s in the room. Tie your worth as a leader to obedience, not a headcount.

4. STUDENTS CAN’T SWIM DEEP

There’s an assumption that teenagers can’t handle theology or the deep truths of God. The result is thinking they only need simple, surface-level messages to keep their attention. So, too often, we stay shallow. We avoid big words, hard passages, or the deep well of God’s Word and truths because we’re afraid students won’t “get it.”

Shane Pruitt from the North American Mission Board says, “If students can understand algebra, chemistry, geometry, biology, literature, physics, and history, they can also understand depravity, Christology, justification, repentance, faith, sanctification, and the great commission.”

Students are hungry for truth and for depth. They’re wrestling with monumental questions that God’s Word answers. Questions about God, the Bible, suffering, identity, sexuality, and justice. The culture around them isn’t holding back from shaping them, so why should the church? Don’t underestimate your students. Swim deep.

5. MINISTRY IS ONLY EXHAUSTING AND OVERWHELMING

Tiredness, fatigue, and exhaustion are a part of youth ministry, not the entire experience. If you scroll through youth ministry Facebook groups, you’ll see youth pastors navigating burnout, exhaustion, and being “done.” I get it. It happens. Sometimes it’s self-inflicted, and sometimes it’s unwarranted or out of your control.

Youth ministry is demanding. A ton of late nights, overnight trips, emotional weight, spiritual battles, and constant interruptions can make you feel like you’re constantly in survival mode. Like most things, if that’s all you can focus on and see, then that becomes your constant reality. If all we talk about is ministry as draining, we’re treating what should be a season like it’s permanent ink.

But that’s not the whole story. There’s the other side of the coin. Ministry is highly rewarding. Ministry is layered with joy, relationships, laughter, life-change, and fun. Every baptism, every student who opens their Bible, every late-night conversation is worth it. You have the opportunity to be part of shaping an eternal soul. How incredible is that?

Your ministry is making a difference. Take joy in that. Find pockets of rest, renewal, and purpose. Ministry isn’t sustained by your strength, so don’t shoulder what isn’t yours.

Paul says in 1 Corinthians 15:58: Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain. 

Youth ministry myths are out there. Some make us laugh, some weigh us down. But remember this: your worth as a youth pastor isn’t in how much fun you have or the size of your youth group.

Share your thoughts with others in our YM360 community:

1. What are other myths in youth ministry you have experienced or feel pressured by?
2. Which of these five myths have you seen evident in your own ministry?

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