From Busy to Balanced

Whenever a vocalist performs on live TV, I enjoy trying to figure out whether or not they’re lip-syncing. If it’s dubbed, the telltale signs of disjointed video and audio inevitably appear. When that happens, my focus moves from the artist to the mismatched elements instead of being able to simply enjoy the music. 

It’s not unlike what happens when we’re busy in unhealthy ways. Our attention shifts from what and who is most important, and we find ourselves just trying to push through until we get to that ambiguous “Once I’m done with____, my life will slow down” moment in time. 

No matter what it is that keeps us constantly on the go, a family calendar with little blank space leaves no room for a balanced rhythm of life. Our kids learn from us what and how to say “yes” or “no” to, so it’s our job as parents to find and maintain a healthy schedule that makes time for the things that are most meaningful.

Here are some ways you can begin to help yourself and your children walk in a rhythm of life that promotes spiritual, emotional, and physical well-being:

Self-Evaluate

Are you trying to keep up with the crazy pace of an endless to-do list? Do you spend more time shuttling your kids here and there than you spend together as a family? Is your daily walk with the Lord minimal because you run out of time? If the rhythm of your life is disordered and chaotic, your child’s life will reflect it, too. Look at all of the things that fill your day and ask how each of those things adds lasting value to your family. Ask the Lord to show you what you need to say no to so that you can say yes to His best.

Model Time with the Lord

One of the most important things you can teach your child is a daily walk with the Lord. Time with Him serves as the cornerstone on which the rest of your life should be built. Being in tune with His presence will influence how you choose to spend the rest of the day. It slows you down and helps you better follow His will instead of your own. Your relationship with the Lord and discipling your children is the most important role you have as a parent.

Observe and Listen

Busyness can negatively impact children just as much as adults, but they don’t necessarily know how to talk about stress, anxiety, worry, or pressure. Make a point to regularly observe your child and listen carefully to him or her. Ask questions like, “How do you feel when you/we are really busy?” “What things do we do as a family that you enjoy/don’t enjoy?” And, “If you could say no to something on the calendar, what would it be?” Pay attention to the answers and prayerfully consider their input as you decide about activities to participate in.

Choose What’s Best

There are countless good things you and your family can do with your time. When you look at what keeps you busy from one day to the next, each thing probably sounded good when you signed up for it. But too many of those “good” things create a not-so-good family rhythm. Creating a schedule with a healthy margin will require you to say no to things you’d like to say yes to. Ask the Lord to help you and your children identify and choose the things that will best nurture relationships with Him and your family, friends, church, and community.

Shifting the calendar from busy to balanced makes room for intentional time together as a family. It gives us and our children space to rest, to create, to play, and to give our full attention to one another. It allows us to be present in precious moments with the Lord and with our kids instead of rushing through them.